Like every other morning amid the slamming of my hand on the snooze button and finally getting my bottom in the car to drive to work, I tuned to the local FM. Driving at 80 mph/130 kmph my concentration was not on the road but an account narrated over the radio station that day.
A caller named Scott calls up a radio station to tell the story of his love affair with a woman he was acquainted to. Scott was hired as a hospital staff through his classmate’s mother’s assistance. Let’s call his classmate’s mother Linda. Every break that he had from his classes during the day, Scott would make frequent visits to Linda’s workplace at the hospital. It was also uncanny how convenient his university was located near the hospital that he could bike to have frequent romps with Linda. The breaking point of this affair was when Linda’s husband became angry to find him in his house way too many times when Linda was around. Apparently, Linda’s husband was also playing the field. Nonetheless, Scott was 17 years old when this affair happened while Linda was 41 years old. While the affair may not have lasted, Scott today at 26 years old found Linda to be attractive.
Why am I remembering this story? Admittedly, it is screwed up when Linda’s marriage is concern. Hence, I am not condoning any ‘extra-curricular’ activities with anyone beyond your spouse. Very simply, this story gave hope. The perspective of an older woman going out with a much younger man is somewhat altered when compared to traditional standards laid down from generations to generations where the younger party should be the woman. As time progresses, slowly but surely, traditional standards start to erode thereby raising fewer eyebrows when an older woman is seen with a younger man having a great time.
I and perhaps many women out there have realised that by attaching ourselves to traditional standards and ignoring our options, we are only limiting ourselves. As women get older, so will our pool of men. Let us perform a simple math. A woman at 18 can have a pool of men that ranges from 20 to 60 years old (Ignore the huge age difference as I have in fact seen that happening). A woman at 30 can have a pool of men that ranges from 30 to 60 years old. At 40, the pool will noticeably decrease from a range of 40 to 60 year old men. This pool did not exclude men who fall into the trap of mid-life crisis or men who cannot survive in the midst of any intelligent and powerful women. Excluding these categories of men will leave women with only a handful to have a meaningful conversation with. Ignoring traditional or conventional standards, women will notice that their pool increase when they allow themselves to go out with men younger than them. As a matter of fact, this is not a new mania in town. Countries like the United Kingdom and United States have carried out census and observed that there is an increasing trend of women dating and marrying younger men.
A while ago, I took this subject matter to my lady friends. Despite the trend, some of my lady friends argued that the age difference may hinder any prospects of a stable and permanent relationship. A few mentioned that they would like to be with someone older as older men have more capability in financially providing for them. Then again, I do have a few of my lady friends in their 40s say, ‘It will be liberating to be able to go out with men half our age who is not intimidated by us, who can make us laugh and carry a good conversation’.
Perhaps, women of different ages aspire for different aspects of a relationship. Regardless of what they are, there are men who cannot bring themselves to roam into uncharted waters of dating older women. As more and more women detach themselves from conventional standards, I look forward to seeing more men take the opportunity to look beyond ‘age’ as a factor and merely enjoy the experiences of being with a compatible woman.
A caller named Scott calls up a radio station to tell the story of his love affair with a woman he was acquainted to. Scott was hired as a hospital staff through his classmate’s mother’s assistance. Let’s call his classmate’s mother Linda. Every break that he had from his classes during the day, Scott would make frequent visits to Linda’s workplace at the hospital. It was also uncanny how convenient his university was located near the hospital that he could bike to have frequent romps with Linda. The breaking point of this affair was when Linda’s husband became angry to find him in his house way too many times when Linda was around. Apparently, Linda’s husband was also playing the field. Nonetheless, Scott was 17 years old when this affair happened while Linda was 41 years old. While the affair may not have lasted, Scott today at 26 years old found Linda to be attractive.
Why am I remembering this story? Admittedly, it is screwed up when Linda’s marriage is concern. Hence, I am not condoning any ‘extra-curricular’ activities with anyone beyond your spouse. Very simply, this story gave hope. The perspective of an older woman going out with a much younger man is somewhat altered when compared to traditional standards laid down from generations to generations where the younger party should be the woman. As time progresses, slowly but surely, traditional standards start to erode thereby raising fewer eyebrows when an older woman is seen with a younger man having a great time.
I and perhaps many women out there have realised that by attaching ourselves to traditional standards and ignoring our options, we are only limiting ourselves. As women get older, so will our pool of men. Let us perform a simple math. A woman at 18 can have a pool of men that ranges from 20 to 60 years old (Ignore the huge age difference as I have in fact seen that happening). A woman at 30 can have a pool of men that ranges from 30 to 60 years old. At 40, the pool will noticeably decrease from a range of 40 to 60 year old men. This pool did not exclude men who fall into the trap of mid-life crisis or men who cannot survive in the midst of any intelligent and powerful women. Excluding these categories of men will leave women with only a handful to have a meaningful conversation with. Ignoring traditional or conventional standards, women will notice that their pool increase when they allow themselves to go out with men younger than them. As a matter of fact, this is not a new mania in town. Countries like the United Kingdom and United States have carried out census and observed that there is an increasing trend of women dating and marrying younger men.
A while ago, I took this subject matter to my lady friends. Despite the trend, some of my lady friends argued that the age difference may hinder any prospects of a stable and permanent relationship. A few mentioned that they would like to be with someone older as older men have more capability in financially providing for them. Then again, I do have a few of my lady friends in their 40s say, ‘It will be liberating to be able to go out with men half our age who is not intimidated by us, who can make us laugh and carry a good conversation’.
Perhaps, women of different ages aspire for different aspects of a relationship. Regardless of what they are, there are men who cannot bring themselves to roam into uncharted waters of dating older women. As more and more women detach themselves from conventional standards, I look forward to seeing more men take the opportunity to look beyond ‘age’ as a factor and merely enjoy the experiences of being with a compatible woman.
